29 December 2009
I admit it, you still make me feel weird.
Don't get me wrong I really really appreciate that your in love and all that. You like this guy, and he's probably a really nice guy, he's real good looking and all that, he's even artistic and all that, we could actually be buddies. But hell, here I am, being miserable for something that is five years old. God, I probably sound so pathetic right now.
I remember Prom night, yes this will so pathetic, when I held you in my arms and we danced some weird dance-like thing. I must've stepped on your foot for at least three times, cut me slack, I was nervous. Do you still remember what I told you? Probably not, fifty other guys were on the line to dance with you. I said, "Pinapangarap ko to ng tatlong taon.", something like that. Pathetic losers like me say stuff like that.
It's very very weird.
You know what I'm doing right now? I'm looking at your facebook photos, and photographs I took way back when. I am looking at them and I feel so pathetic doing it.
No, really, don't mind me. I'm a writer, I write stuff, this is what I do, so don't you go worrying about the stuff I've been saying. Not that you'll be able to read this anyway, never had that much confidence since second year highschool, and that was done in a really cowardly way too, giving you all those pathetic poems I did. Do you still have them? Probably stuffed underneath your pillow or something? Hah, I wish, if you still have it it's probably deep in the pile of stuff all the guys that try to win your heart has given you.
I don't even understand this, It's not like there were no girls after you, I had my fair share, and then some. You we're, like, the girl that never was. That I never went any distance with. Maybe that's it, I placed you on the pedestal, my deity, nobody can take you place inside of me, you'd always be that special creature of the human species that will torment my internal organs forever. And that makes me pathetic.
A friend says, "It's just weird, it's never pathetic." Maybe she's right, liking you is never pathetic, your the first girl I used the word "love" with, that may not be so pathetic. If you we're just another trophy beauty damsel then it would be very pathetic but you're not. You're the female human that stood in a place in my consciousness and never left.
I don't know, maybe I'm just regressing, sorry for wasting you're time. I'm pretty sure he's a great guy and he loves you very much. Click nga kayo 'di ba? Hahaha. yeah I stalk him too so I know he's pretty neat, and I hate that because it doesn't give me a reason to hate the guy. So there, just had to say it, keep in touch.
Sorry for being weird, don't worry, I have no idea what I'm talking about either.
32 things said:
hahaha, pakilala mo nga saken yan.. patingin kung sino yung kinababaliwan ng pagkarami-raming lalaki at binibigyan ng dose-dosenang tula :)) i'm interested dowd. 'Pag ako lang na-disappoint sa kanyang anyo, alam na, mas pathetic ka pa sa sinasabi mo.
regarding your pathetic-ness, yep, you look pathetic xD pero di porket pathetic wala nang kwenta hahaha at hindi din lahat ng walang kwenta, loser. timo ko, walang kwenta pero tingin ko di ako loser (tingin ko lang naman yun nyahahhaa).
oo alam ko walang kwenta to, at pang-sayang lang ng ispasyo sa web, eh ganun din naman sabi ng tag mo e.. pang sayang oras lang :)) kea sinakyan ko wooot. ge
jammin, wala kang kwenta, pero mayabang ka, ergo tingin mo 'di ka loser =)).
pero agree ako, pag nakita ko yan at 'di ko nagustuhan yung nakita ko... friends pa rin tayo, ernie. haha, labo.
Riiiiight, Like I'm ever gonna show her face to you, hehehehehe, Hindi, hindi sya maganda sa standard na aabot sa standards mo, at oo grabe akong pathetic.
Regression lang naman to, a moment in time ganun, hah, nakita ko lang kasing matinong tao ang boypren nya (ahaheehehhehehehehe)
yapperpangsayangoras
Taena nyoooooooooooooooooo...
SHOW HER FACE!
SHOW HER FACE!
SHOW HER FACE!!! weeee :))
A little bit stalker-ish pero I won't deny that there were instances when I acted that way too. :D Bitterness can really make you snap, but hope you'll get stronger each day. Just an advice even if you're not asking from me and that we're not close, but try to pray, not for her to come back, but pray to God that He'll give you strength to live days without her (if she really does not decide to return). That's a similar advice I got from my Mom that fortunately saved my life. Hope it could save you too from being emo. Anyways, take care and God bless. :D
Shieeeeraaaaaap!!!
Thank you very much, um, no I'm not really snapping though, I do this all the time (which isn't really saying much for my defense, ahehehehe). Yeah, T'was long long ago, I've lived the days okay with just regular retrogressions like this, which are freak incidents, by the way.
Emoness, though, as my buddies (and Ate Romie) could attest to, is a lifestyle, works for writing! Sucks most of the other times other than when I'm writing.
She's Happy, I'm always miserable anyway, so I guess it ain't all that bad.
Ahahaha I totally agree :D writing (poems) is a remedy.. :D I'll be reading some of your compositions, hope you don't mind. :D
dali dali dali dali!! show her face!!! :))
No, I don't, I write for the world to read.
One day in the year of the fox
di ko gets punchline... uhhh, nraramdaman ko lang na joke to e hahaha
wala atang year of the fox O_O
=))
stil. show her face!! =))
emo T_\\
hahhaha medyo ganun nga yun,, one day in the year op chikenpox hahahahah,, kanta :D
di ko pa tapos basahin.. dahil nagnanakaw ako ng net.. pero binasa ko ng di torow. haha...
may kowt ako mula kay banila..at dahil galing to sa kanya, baka ayaw mo na,, pero share ko na rin, nagagagndahan kasi ako :D
"Well, Nostalgia rapes you hard once you turn your back. And you'll enjoy it so much you'll fuck back." ~Pablo Banila
attachment?
Pagpasensyahan na natin, Giniling Festival lang kilala ng tenga nyan ahehehehe
Hindi ko alam kung gusto mo ba akong matuwa o iniinis mo lang talaga ako.
Thanks dude :D
Pwede bang rape-in ang lalaki, physically? I mean, the guy can always refuse to get (it) up, ya know. =))
SHOW THE FACE, DEMET.
Or alam mo ano yung ginagawa nung mga hayok na babae online, yung ipapakita yung magagandang bahagi lang ng katawan (though that'd be wrong, I admit)?
We might be picking on you, but here's the point, and I'm afraid I'll be a bit blunt: Is she really worth all the effort, Ernie?
Well, really, what effort? Why should I give any effort? She's with a great guy at the moment.
Is anybody really not worth the effort? Who Decides if she's worth it really? I think she is, she's an absolutely wonderful girl. This is just an acknowledgement of feeling weird about her being happy with a guy.
I don't know, by your standards, if she is worth yours (or heck, Jammin's!). I refuse to show her face to at least save me some self esteem about my choice of women. ahehehehehehehehe
Thinking requires effort, pare. Or maybe it doesn't. But when it gets in the way of more important things, effort yun. Pero we're two different beings, I dunno, really.
And there's supposed to be nothing weird about being happy for someone. And yet it's weird. Putang ina yan 'o.
Oh come on, 'di naman siguro ganun kapangit yan, Ernie. Don't make me beg. ;)
No, I'm not happy for her, *laughter*.I acknowledge that she is happy,
Sige, next year.
wahahahahahaha! still show her face :)) i dont care what argument you may present :)) still, show her face!! :)) di ko sya lalaitin pramis.. (unless kalait-lait a) ikaw lang naman lalaitin ko so yah, you're used to that hahahhaha :))
Used? More like, tired men, :))
as your friends, you should know that picking on people make us happy. 'specially picking on you. HAHA. so ernie, thank you ah! :D
Yeah, I enjoy it as much as the other guy, but pick all you want, not gonna show her face.
You said this on the 31st of December LAST year. OK lang yan, kahit sa "Boys'" Night Out lang pleaaaaaaaase :))
Fine! sa Boy's night out then! Basta libre na ako sa lahat ahehehehehehehehe.
It's settled, then. ;)
"ama namiiiiiiin.... Sumasalangit kaaaaa..."
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